Close Your File

Of the many life skills that you will learn along the way, 'Closing Your Files' is one of the most important and frequently used in our lives.

"I tried my best mom; I don't know what will happen though. They did accept my application, but also marked it as a late entry. I am just getting tensed."

My daughter was tensed after one of the critical submissions she had to do with her application to one of the prestigious institutes that she had been vying for.

"Thats ok dear, you did your best. Leave it now."

"How can I just forget it mom? It is so vital for my career."

"I know it is, but then you did what you could. Now, it is time to close the file."

We know that effort is much more important than the results. We control efforts, not results. And that is the key to our happiness.

Having said that, there are so many situations in our life where the results are extremely important for us and may chart the future course of our life. What do we do in such cases? A little bit of luck here and there can change everything.

This was just one open thread in our daughter's mind. Such open threads keep criss-crossing each one of our minds. 

• What will happen to my next promotion? 
• What if my health does not improve, even with the new medicines?
• Will my brother's surgery be successful?
• What if I was given pink slip because the company has no business now a days?
• What if my boy/girl friend is ditching me?
• What if I don't catch this last flight today?

And the list is endless. With so much chaos and traffic in our minds, it is no surprise that the mind's ability to focus on the things that matter, the things that brings results, is jaded and faded.

"What do you mean - close the file? Which file are you talking about, and this seems so irrelevant to such an important discussion I am having with you."

"You remember your school days and that painting class?"

"Arre yes, of course, I do. Anjali ma'am was so strict. I was always tensed in her class. But why do you want to discuss that right now?"

"And what did you do when the time was up, and you could not finish the painting to your liking?"

"Nothing that I could do after the time was up. I had to just handover my art file to her."

"So, what did you exactly do, and what did you think at that point?"

"What did I do? Nothing, I just closed my file and handed over to her, and just prayed that she would be kind enough to ignore my mistakes."

"Cool, but did you feel that you were always given fair grades by your Anjali ma'am?"

"Not, not at all. Not always at least. I was treated unfairly many times. Don't you remember I came home crying one day and you straight away took me to Pizza Hut?"

"Yeah, yeah - feels nostalgic now. But could you do anything with those 'unfair' grades?"

"What could I do mom? Nothing. She never changes the grades once she gives it."

"Thats all I am trying to tell you, that life is no different. We are not perfect, and life is also not always fair. All you can do after giving your best effort is to close the file and handover to HIM."

Arushi was silent for a moment.

"And how do you expect me to actually close the file - I mean there is nothing physical here."

"You have that idol I gave you, right?"

"Yes."

"Sit on a chair. Keep HIS idol in front of you on the table. Tell him how important this file is for you and how much you have worked for it. Then just mentally visualize you closing this file and handing over to HIM - your ultimate teacher. After that, your thread is closed forever, and now - whether we feel it is fair or not - you have to accept every result. There is nothing else you can do now. It's over now as far as this situation is concerned. There are many more threads to handle in life - and we need to focus on them too."

"Hmm.... OK mom, I will try. It's not easy though."

"Yes, it's not easy. But these are life skills which can make your life worthy. And you know that anything worthwhile..."

Arushi didn't let mom complete her sentence...

"Yeah yeah, don't repeat that again for the nth time, I know it - Anything worthwhile doesn't come easy. We should be looking for worthy goals; not easy goals."

"You are smart...you had to be, because you are my daughter."

They smiled and after a while, chatted on some more sundry topics before my closing the call. And as I heard the entire conversation on speaker phone, I could not resist appreciating her life skills, and how lucky I have been to have her in my life.

I may have more degrees than her, I may be earning more money than her - but earning money is just one life skill. Earning money is important, for sure. But there are so many other life skills to learn. 

She is an ocean of so many other life skills that I always try to keep learning from her, and she keeps surprising me with new stuff on and off. Closing Your File is the latest addition to my repository of life skills.

Related Books: Happiness Unlimited | A Father's Diary

Related Blogpost: The fine Art of Acceptance

Regards

Manoj Arora
Official Website